How to Fake Sick for School
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How to Fake Sick for School: 5 Useful Tips

The school year is about to start. Are you ready for it? Are you already thinking of excuses not to go? Are you one of those students that like school but want to skip a day or two pretending to be sick? Whatever the reason, you’ll need to learn how to fake sick for school if you want to spend the day in the comfort of your home.

But how can you fool your parents? How can you convince them you’re sick? How do you fake sick for school and make it look like the real deal so parents would believe? It’s not easy, but it’s doable!

We’re here to show you some tips and tricks on how to fake sick for school. Once you master faking sick, your parents will undoubtedly vouch for you at school, and you’ll be on the clear to enjoy your well-earned day home.

But, bear in mind, parents are clever! They were probably doing the same things when they were your age. Therefore you need to play it smart and safe!

5 Tips on How to Fake Sick for School

Consider the process of faking sick for school as an art, and you’re the artist. It’s important to go through the art of faking sick step by step. But, before you begin this deceitful journey, you must be certain that you’re capable of lying to the ones you love most, your family. If you’re still determined and you think you can lie and deny, read on.

We’ve prepared a list of 5 useful tips you need to learn to understand the art of faking sick for school. Go through the list carefully, and make sure you don’t miss a thing:

5 Tips on How to Fake Sick for School
Credit: @fuggthefeels

1. Make School Seem Like Your Priority

The first thing you’ve got to do even before you start faking sick is to make school seem like your priority. This is an important step on the journey of how to fake sick for school, so make sure you don’t skip it. You can show your excitement by handing in a super cool project assignment that’s due tomorrow.

You can say that you’re looking forward to reading the essay that you’ve finished and you’re proud of. Or you can share with your parents that tomorrow’s pizza day and you’re looking forward to it. You don’t want to miss pizza day, right! It’s really important to create a setting before you start “getting sick”. Because when you “suddenly” become sick you’re going to be more disappointed that you can’t go to school than your parents. That makes your faking sick even more believable.

2. Pick a Sickness and Stick to it

If you want to convince your parents that you’re sick, pick a sickness and stick to it! You’ll need actual proof that you’re sick and that requires research. Whether you decide to go with a cold, high temperature, or stomach flu, you have to conduct detailed research so your fake sickness will look convincing:

  • What temperature do you need to be having a fiver?

Normal body temperature ranges between 97 F (36.1 C) and 99 F (37.2 C). It depends on your daily activities, how active you are, have you been running, doing sports or just relaxing. To indicate a fever you’ll need thermometer readings between 99 F (37.2 C) and 102.2 F (39 C). This information will stop you from faking fiver with a 107.2 F body temperature on a thermometer held under hot waterfor far too long.

You don’t want a trip to the doctor’s office, do you? It’s probably wiser to soak a towel in hot water and when your parents come to feel your forehead they’ll think you’re burning up. Be careful there’s little time between putting on the towel, drying your forehead, and calling your parents. That means you’ve got to act fast if you want your parents’ verdict to be-no school for you mister/miss!

  • What are the symptoms of a common cold?

Usually, the symptoms of a common cold include running nose, sneezing, a sore throat, muscle aches, headaches, coughs, slightly raised temperature and loss of taste and smell. You should be well aware of these symptoms because it’s hard to fake a cold, mums can tell a real runny nose and a cough from the fake ones. So, do your homework symptoms-wise and make it work.

  • What are the symptoms of stomach flu?

Stomach flu is transferred through contact with an infected person or by drinking contaminated water, or by eating contaminated food. This knowledge will come in handy when after showing your symptoms you share the suspicions of your disease by mentioning that the friend you go to school with had the stomach flu a few days back or the water you drank yesterday seemed kind of odd and blurry.

If you’re trying to fake stomach flu you should be aware of the following symptoms: stomachache, stomach cramps, nausea, vomiting, and in some cases fever. Once you’re familiar with stomach flu symptoms, it’s not a bad idea to wake your mom or dad up in the middle of the night to report a vomiting incident. If you’re determined to go all the way, consider mixing up a batch of fake vomit to add a convincing note to your disease.

3. Start Showing Symptoms the Night Before

Now that you’ve done your homework and know everything there’s to know about the sickness you’re going to fake and its symptoms, it’s time to put the show on the run. Remember, stick to the sickness and try not to mix the symptoms from another disease. When that’s settled start showing slight symptoms the night before. Don’t overdo it, and try to be patient. Think about the result, a day away from school!

It’s wise to give some hints on how you feel over dinnertime. Act sad and tired. Start your dinner but don’t finish it, even if it’s your favorite. Show one symptom at a time, slowly, gradually, until parents get the whole picture. Once they see that’s something wrong, they’ll pay more attention to your behavior, so be careful not to slip, and give away the fact that you’re not sick.

As we mentioned earlier faking sick is an art, so make sure you play your role to perfection!

4. Change Your Usual Routine

At this point, it’s important to make a little sacrifice. You need to change your usual routine and the things you love doing to trick your parents into believing that something’s wrong. If you’re favorite night routine is watching a show, then don’t watch it. Say you’ll need to call it a night and go to bed early. If you had a plan to see your friends, cancel it.

And again retire to bed early. That’ll set off a red alarm that there’s something wrong. If your parents start asking questions don’t say too much, just say you’re not feeling well and need to go to lie down. Even though you’ll go to bed early, don’t fall asleep. You can pretend to sleep if they come to check on you, but by staying up late you’ll have baggy eyes in the morning that’ll help you in the entire sick look.

Wake up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. Try doing that a few times, for your parents to notice. Frequent visits to the bathroom in the middle of the night are never a good sight. So it’ll be easier to convince your parents in the morning that you’re sick and you had problems the entire night.

5. Boost the Morning Symptoms

Now it’s time to boost the morning symptoms of the disease of your choice. Whatever the disease you’re trying to fake it’s crucial to wake up before your parents. Start by visiting the bathroom and make cough sounds or vomit sounds if you decide to go with the stomach flu. You can then try the kitchen, so when the parents get up they’ll see you trying to make tea for your sick throat or stomach, looking all tired and messy.

Complain about what’s troubling you and stay focused on the disease’s symptoms. Don’t mix things up. Don’t complain that you’re having a headache and a stomachache at the same time. If you complain of stomachache you could add nausea and morning diarrhea.

At this point, even if you’ve already shown the necessary symptoms ask your parents to be excused and go get dressed. Take your time, if they come in to check on you, dress slowly, but not too slowly. You don’t want to insult your parents’ intelligence, so keep it real. Once they see you in that state and return to your behavior the night before and your frequent visits to the bathroom in the middle of the night along with the morning symptoms you should be out in the clear to enjoy your day away from school.

Conclusion

By now you probably have a clearer picture of how to fake sick for school. Hopefully, our 5 tips will get you closer to your day away from school. Nevertheless, don’t forget the most important thing. Don’t overuse it and don’t try to fake sick every other day. Wait for the right time, when there’s a real reason for you to stay at home. A big test coming up and you feel you’re not quite ready and you need more time. An important assignment that’s due for tomorrow that you weren’t able to finish, or you feel embarrassed over an incident in school that happened the day before, and you need to lay low for a while.

Therefore, use the tips on how to fake sick for school wisely and only when it’s absolutely necessary if you want to look convincing and succeed in your intention of having a day off from school. So, fake it and make it count!

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